Rick Valassi

"Welcome back. I'm Rick Valassi, and you - you lucky bastards - are listening to "Wouldn't You Know It.""

- Rick Valassi

Rick Valassi is a freelance reporter, conspiracy theorist, and radio show broadcaster/podcaster. A New York City native, his personal pirate radio show is called Wouldn't You Know It where he talks about the current issues with Manhattan, what he has found out about various topics, and his myriad rumors and theories.

His radio show can be heard very frequently over the radios at safe houses and in The Terminal.

Biography
Richard Valassi ("Richie" to the neighborhood; "Riccardo" to his grandmother, Gisella; "Valasshole" to his Army buddies) was the youngest of three born to Frank and Bette Valassi, who ran a cheese shop in Little Italy. Rick was bright and attended Bronx Science, but the draft interfered with his parents' plans for him to go to college.

When he returned from the war in 1971 (shrapnel destroyed his knee on his first day back in country on his second tour), he was inspired by John Kerry's testimony to the Fulbright Commission and spent a couple of years working with Vietnam Veterans Against the War (VVAW), planning rallies, marches, and other civil disobedience.

Eventually the need to make a living intervened, and Valassi took a job with the U.S. Postal Service and enrolled in night classes at Kings College (back when it was in the Empire State Building) on the G.I. Bill. He's worked for the USPS ever since.

The Green Poison crisis feels like the moment his whole life has been building toward: a chance to use the network of bureaucratic drudges he's amassed over decades to gather information about what's going on and how those with money and power are planning to exploit it. Rick always imagined himself as a voice in the night, speaking truth to power, arming regular people with information. Now he's doing exactly that.

Wouldn't You Know It
Rick's radio reports include many topics, generally providing a semi-informed civilian's perspective on the events of the game. Topics include the nature of the Green Poison, observations and warnings about the various factions across Manhattan, the Dark Zone, Directive 51 and The Division.

An admitted conspiracy theorist with a paranoid streak, most of his reporting is based on either first-hand observations or information from his "sources." He tends to be cynical about the current state of affairs but remains genuinely concerned for the city and his fellow New Yorkers, continually urging his listeners to stay safe, keep the faith, and keep him abreast of any new information that arises.

Rick admits to having stayed in Rikers Island for a short time during his youth.

Judy Walters
The "Missing Person: Judy Walters" mission series features Valassi attempting to reach out to Judy Walters, a would-be whistleblower for the pharmaceutical company Vexix, to get her information on how her company may have withheld information on their progress towards a cure for the Green Poison. The final ECHO in the sequence - Judy accidentally struck dead in the street by a taxi cab - features Rick himself standing in the street, on the phone with a news editor and explaining how he saw the accident himself.

With Judy's death, he momentarily lamented the loss of his story before finding her USB stick in the street, which ISAC identifies as containing "non-disclosed" information regarding Vexix. Rick proclaims that "this story isn't over" before walking off.

Role in Warlords of New York
Following the end of the Warlords campaign, Rick Valassi is heard on the radio during a cutscene. He states that, without the Division, the local JTF and Peacekeepers would have been less successful (or killed). He goes on to thank the agents for, in his words, "De-worming the Big Apple."

Appearances

 * Tom Clancy's The Division
 * Tom Clancy's The Division 2 (Warlords of New York Expansion )