|This article contains spoilers that may spoil some of or most of Warlords of New York. Proceed with caution!|
“ Welcome back. I'm Rick Valassi, and you - you lucky bastards - are listening to "Wouldn't You Know It." ”
Rick Valassi is a freelance reporter, conspiracy theorist, and radio show broadcaster/podcaster. A New York City native, his personal pirate radio show is called ''Wouldn't You Know It,'' where he talks about the current issues with Manhattan, what he has found out about various topics, and his myriad rumors and theories. His radio show can be heard very frequently over the radios at safe houses and in The Terminal.
Rick's radio reports include many topics, generally providing a semi-informed civilian's perspective on the events of the game. Topics include the nature of the Green Poison, observations and warnings about the various factions across Manhattan, the Dark Zone, Directive 51 and The Division, and others.
An admitted conspiracy theorist with a paranoid streak, most of his reporting is based on either first-hand observations or information from his "sources." He tends to be cynical about the current state of affairs but remains genuinely concerned for the city and his fellow New Yorkers, continually urging his listeners to stay safe, keep the faith, and keep him abreast of any new information that arises.
Rick admits to having stayed in Rikers Island for a short time during his youth.
The "Missing Person: Judy Walters" mission series features Valassi attempting to reach out to Judy Walters, a would-be whistleblower for the pharmaceutical company Vexix, to get her information on how her company may have withheld information on their progress towards a cure for the Green Poison. The final ECHO in the sequence - Judy accidentally struck dead in the street by a taxi cab - features Rick himself standing in the street, on the phone with a news editor and explaining how he saw the accident himself.
With Judy's death, he momentarily lamented the loss of his story before finding her USB stick in the street, which ISAC identifies as containing "non-disclosed" information regarding Vexix. Rick proclaims that "this story isn't over" before walking off.
Early Life Edit
Richard "Rick" Valassi is the youngest of the three children of Frank and Bette Valassi. He also has a grandmother named Gisella who calls him "Riccardo". The life or death status of these individuals is unknown.
Rick grew up in Little Italy where he was known as "Richie". Rick attended the Bronx High School of Science, a highly competitive magnet school. He had planned to go to college after graduating but was drafted into the United States Army. He served one tour in Vietnam and was to serve a second, but his second tour was cut short when shrapnel destroyed his knee on the first day back in the country. After presumably receiving a medical discharge, he returned home and spent a couple of years working with Vietnam Veterans Against the War (V.V.A.W).
Rick eventually attended night classes at Kings College on the G.I. Bill and also took a job with the United States Postal Service where he worked up until the events of the story.
Following the end of the Warlords campaign, Rick Valassi is heard on the radio during a cutscene. He states that, without the Division, the local JTF and Peacekeepers would have been less successful (or killed). He goes on to thank the agents for, in his words, "De-worming the Big Apple."